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My ex and I split up about a month ago. I did try no contact but I kept failing and we ended up spending some of the weekend together. I saw it as a step forward but it’s since gone horribly wrong.
When we split, he said the main reason was because of him struggling with some of the health issues. However, since the weekend he told me that another problem was the fact that I was ready for the future and he isn’t.
We were together for over 5 years and I was beginning to want to buy a house and get engaged.
Is it now best for me to just move on?
@purple26 – Sadly, yes I think it’s time to give up. No engagement after 5 years tells the story. He doesn’t think of you as the “one” and would rather break up than continue. Best for both of you to move on. Time will heal your heartbreak.
He’s always been very immature though. For example, he still wants to go out on lads holidays and although he’s got the money to buy a house, he isn’t interested in it at all.
He did say that he thinks there is a possibility of us getting back together in the future because he thinks that there is something between us.
I just don’t know what to think.
@purple26 – How old are you two? Going out with his friends on holiday isn’t unusual because guys like to hang out together. If he has enough to buy a house and doesn’t want to.. maybe he lives at home with parents? or rents an apartment (unwise) thereby not a good investment like a house. And there’s probably other things he does to show his immaturity. Anyway, don’t put your life on hold for him. Date others and have fun. It may take years for him to “grow up”!
We are both 25. We were renting but hes now moved back to his mums.
I really do believe that he is the one and I now really regret putting pressure on him. I had started talking about marriage and children even though I know he gets in these panics about the future.
You’re both very young and have some time before marriage and children. It seems he had such strong opposition against progressing any further to buy a house, marry you, and have children that he preferred to move out and go back to his mother’s place. I know you were together 5+ years, but how long did you actually live together? Did you resolve other conflicts via respectful interactions?
There’s no guarantee you will end up together, that’s why I suggested dating others. If you don’t want to do that right now, I suggest not seeing him too often. Let him realize what life would be without you. Don’t spend the weekend with him again. If you do, he will get the benefits of being in a relationship without the commitment. Go out and have fun like in the beginning.
I hope this turns out the way you want and wishing you luck..
We lived together for nearly two years. We never really argued – we had little disagreements but never full blown arguments. Everything was always settled quickly.
I’m back to going out with my friends on nights out and I’m pushing for a promotion at work so that’s keep me busy for a bit now.
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