Boards No Contact Rule Should I initiate a meeting in these circumstances?

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  • #73629
    Coldsummer1
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    • Total Posts: 2

    I broke up with him, because he wasn’t sure about our relationship. I told him I do love and want him but not when he’s constantly in doubt. We both cried and I do hope time makes him see he does love me.
    I tried NC but after 2 weeks he texted and asked to come over and give me my stuff. Since we study in the same place I assumed he wanted to talk, or he wouldn’t have come over. I wrote a letter to sort my thoughts and know what to say, but he didn’t initiate a conversation so I just gave him the letter. It was handwritten and mostly just said that I did love him, but not at any cost, and I deserve someone who is sure about me.
    A few days later he texted me, saying he “doesn’t know how long it will take before he has the energy to write back” but read it many times and doesn’t want me to think he’s ignoring. The way he wrote that made it sound like he’s doing me a favor by replying, so I texted that he shouldn’t feel obligated to answer, whatever he wants.
    It’s been two more weeks and he hadn’t replied. We see each other almost every day but never talk. I look happy and surrounded with friends. In the last week it looks like he’s trying to catch my attention, sitting across from me on the lawn, or outside the window when I have a class, adding people I study with (who aren’t his friends) on facebook… Also he STILL hasn’t changed he whatsapp status, which was about our relationship (whatsapp is the main texting app in my country).
    It’s been a month but I hesitate to contact because I feel like the ball is in his court now… What should I do?

    #73658
    Sarah_davies
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 6

    Hey,

    I feel a bit like he is keeping you in limbo. “Not knowing when he has the energy” he knows how he feels about the letter deep down but he’s not sharing it with you- sort of like to keep you waiting, which really isn’t fair. As he is doing things to get your attention I think this shows that the NC rule is working to some point as he is starting to crack slightly. If I was you I would do 2 more weeks of no contact and if he hasn’t reached out then you can send a simple WhatsApp asking how he is then go off his response. From my experience I find men are better at communicating when some time has passed. But I wouldn’t initiate meeting quite yet- just my thoughts.

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